Cocktails and emotions

Damn she woke me up at noon
The dogs already used the bathroom
Stinking up my living room
I was trying to catch a snooze
I couldn't sleep again
Popped another valium
To stop the nightmares

Scared her to tears
My heart wasn't beating
I still won't admit
My health is fleeing
Maybe I need help
Yet dwelling on it only makes
The night worse I'm searching
For an oxy, valium or some lean
I just need the morphine

Don't judge me
I don't need your pity
I'm almost in the coma now
I had my heart ripped out
I still haven't learned my lesson
Aftering laughing and drinking
I totaled the car
Should of woke up in the hospital
Full of tubes and worried family

Then I heard her voice
Be a real man stand up
I'll admit I have a problem
I just lost my best friend
No one understands
This New me
I've become a recluse
In pursuit of what
I'm not sure
The hallucinogens
haven't told me yet

I looked into my mother's eyes
They told me Im
Pissing away my history
The future looks bleak
I'm reading a Dean koontz story
On the kindle I got on my birthday
It gives me a reason to be
At an all time low

Wake up wake up are you ok
I know that voice
I'm pulling through
Why did I have to
Hit rock bottom before
It finally hit me
What if I didn't make it back
I would never get
To beat my little brother
In call of duty
Never get to see you
In the future too
Never give my grandmother
That grandchild she's
been waiting for

I looked at your picture
Just the other day
You never said a word back
I find that I
have nothing to say
Your eyes still mesmerized me
Felt weak at the knees
How can this be